Hello everyone I guess we need to have the conversation that is always most difficult to be honest about if we font have of feel it , and not just from friends but from your soal mate  ,

Apparently theres one for  everyone somewhere out there.

As for me I was definitely attracted to girls from early on , I have three sisters and its not the same sort of thing .

I even sort of liked their mums. , so i was definitely attracted heterosexual.

So as i got  to around 12 this had all got more intense for me and I showed more attention and decided Id get myself a girlfriend and became I was even at that age shit frightened of rejection.
So id get a mate or my suster Debbie to go ask the girl that i liked to be my girlfriend.

This proved to be quite effective, so i used that technique for the next few years as my puppy love was always short lived ,

And sometimes we kissed  and fooled about in a great hidden spot , but boys were banned from the girls Underground locker room you could if you faced the right way make out with your girl
Whilst keeping a lookout for a teacher that spotted my smoke coming out the cracks coming across the quadrangle towards my
love shack ,
So no-kisses whilst pretending to be a school bag crouching down on the ground, once she left back to my new favourite thing kissing 

So this was a pattern right through tech school  and some I met up with outside the school yard wire fence , for you gessed it , kissing and now heavy petting .

I dont know exactly what kissing did to me but it was like filling my emoty heart up with love 

 I couldnt get enough.

So I had lots of mates around the town that I knocked around with ,
One mate in particular was Darren Hughes
He was a larricsn and a great guy , he had a girlfriend that was absolutely Stunning,
They were sweethearts  for a few years when she moved to town , they were on and off and now they are off and had been for three months,

I went to a party , at my ex’s, and I saw her with a man I knew and at the end of the night she walked past me sitting on the veranda and I thought thats nice so I reached  out and I pinched her on the bum, she turned and said something and I’m half deaf as I thought she said do you want to take me home?
Of course I  said yes.
She went and told her date that she was mine, Chris wasn’t impressed as it smashed his ego to bits but there was no challenge .

So you can guess the next bits, and  yes I’m good in bed at snooring lol

But all this made me learn about love mates and mixing the two can cost oneself.

Darren and me were never the same, it seems that my heart 

 had cost me a good friend and a hard lesson as I hate loosing friends.

I want to add this part now

So many tears later I ran into Daz Cat  we had a good chat and I apologised for hurting him , and he just smiled his cherkyiest grin and said it was all ok ge wasnt angry with me at all.
I believe we had a beer .

Now they say that what goes around comes around so prepare yourself for this.

I had a wife , two boys a dog a house a a buisness a boat etc. so I was cruising along until things changed I became unwell and the doctors couldn’t sort it out for two years or more ,
So I went from hot to cold , fast to slow , happy to sad , busy to bed .
Pauli , she put up with it , and it was at times harrowing and she did her very best ,to help me through ,
But accidentally my bestie Bill pinched Paulie on the ass and it worked again as she was lonely because I was lost in hell .

When it came out I was devastated, but trying to understand why I deserved this ?

I was no Darren but a bit older .

I had nothing but my buisness , I stole the dog the first day but Bill and Paulie told me that it was Bens dog not mine .

I cried to Fay  about Paulie for over ten years she is my good friend and i love Fay and her family.

To be continued

Cheers xxx